All of us dream of finding the right one. When we find them, we hope to spend the rest of our lives happily with them.What a wonderful life it would be, right? Everything would be perfect.However, That’s not how the reality works. Often, we get heartbroken over and over again as we try to move on from failed relationships. It’s not easy to mend the pain and forget the painful memories. It’s like trying so hard to start living our life once again without the existence of our ex-lover. Incredibly hard, isn’t it? The horrible truth about love is that there’s always a dark side to it.Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? Or are you in one? It’s downright traumatizing to see your supposed-to-be knight-in-shining-armor turn to be your greatest nightmare.
“The signs of sociopathy are usually there before we are abused; most of us just don’t know enough to recognize them” ― P. A. Speers
How can you heal from an abusive relationship to be able to love one again? Read on.
Don’t be obsessed with finding the “right one.”
Different people have different standards and preferences when it comes to choosing the significant other. In fact, people usually have a long list of qualifications that the person should meet. They refer to this list when evaluating the “ideal,” “perfect,” or simply the “right” person. While there’s nothing wrong in referring to your ideal list, it’s not healthy when you’re trying to commit to a real relationship because you limit yourself to the image you create. That’s not how the reality works. You need to understand that not everyone is perfect and that there will never be a perfect partner for you. You’ll just waste your time looking for the perfect individual. What you need to do is to look beyond the facade of your loved one. Embrace their imperfections and try to complement their weakness with your strength, and vice versa. If you learn how to respect and acknowledge one another, you’ll know what to expect from your partner. This sense of equality will give you the bottom line in your next relationship. You should now know that you’re equal and value each other. You should not be fighting like death is hanging around you. Engaging in an abusive relationship is self-degradation.
Let go of negative feelings from your failed relationship.
Being in an abusive relationship can be traumatizing. Besides the physical injuries, it’s also possible that your partner left a scar in your mind and soul. It may be difficult, but we encourage you to leave them. Let go of these negative feelings and thoughts. A new chance was given to you, so don’t shoulder all these burdens anymore. Start anew by having a fresh memory and positivity in life.
Ask yourself if your belief is really true.
You might be tempted to generalize all men as an abusive, authoritative, and just downright jerks. However, we recommend that you refrain from stereotyping. It’ natural if you feel so, but you need to think outside the box. Remember that not all men are abusive. Don’t conclude that all men are just bound to hurt you just because you’ve experienced something unpleasant with one man. Remember that it’s just a bad day, a bad memory, but never a bad life. You have to bear in mind that someone else out there will love you unconditionally and profoundly.
Love yourself because you’re worth it
Sure, you might feel incredibly worthless because your last partner treated you like crap, but the truth is, you’re not. The person just failed to see the rare gem you are., which means they don’t deserve your love. So stop doubting your self-worth because you’re perfect as you are. There’s nothing wrong with you. You don’t need to change because if someone truly loves you, they will love and accept you for who you are.
“If you walked away from a toxic, negative, abusive, one-sided, dead-end low vibrational relationship or friendship — you won.” ― Lalah Delia